baby boomer sex Archives - Dr. KarenTurnerPhD

Sex and the Single Baby Boomer

Karen Turner — Fri, 01 Sep 2023 20:29:52 +0000

Baby boomers were the pioneers of sexual freedom in the sixties; the flag bearers of free love and peace and the promoters of sexual enjoyment for everyone. Sexual confidence in abundance was the order of the day back then and most baby boomers embraced their new sexual freedom with considerable enthusiasm.

Baby boomers are now entering middle age; some are already into their sixties and seventies and sexual emancipation is no longer something shocking but rather it is rightly accepted as normal behavior for most intelligent and socially enlightened members of the community.

Later life brings emotional turmoil as friends and lovers begin to develop a frailty that is not consistent with a rampant sex life. Some baby boomers continue to enjoy a healthy sexual and emotional relationship with their chosen partners but for singles it can be a little more complicated.

Single life in middle age is somewhat different to being single in your early twenties and thirties. For men and women with financial stability following a lifetime of hard work and saving for a pension and security, there is a real risk of being exploited financially by a younger sexual partner.

People with strong family commitments and an affectionate bond with children and grandchildren can run into difficulty when trying to conduct a healthy sex life alongside traditional family values. Grandad is not supposed to have sexual feelings and if he does he is expected to keep them securely under wraps and out of sight of the kids and neighbors! Otherwise he runs the risk of being ‘labelled’.

A single existence in later life prompts a barrage of invitations from well intentioned match makers to ‘fix’ a situation that might actually be perfectly acceptable. A man or woman who has enjoyed a lifetime relationship with a wife or husband now deceased might be quite content to enjoy a single life once the pain of grief has abated sufficiently to pursue some social interaction. A determined match maker can cause havoc in the life of a happy and well balanced single baby boomer.

The social opportunities for aging boomers and elderly single people are now so varied it is impossible not to find hobbies and entertainments if one is so inclined. The days when the elderly were expected to sit quietly in the rocking chair on the porch are long gone to be replaced by club outings, fine dining, day trips, sight seeing expeditions and dancing lessons. Everyone is paid attention to; nobody is sidelined in a social scene that caters for every interest and social events are even categorized in the local papers to exactly pinpoint race, religion, age group, dietary requirements, and sexual preferences.

There is absolutely no excuse for a lonely existence for single baby boomers in later life: the social choices are wide and varied enough to cover every taste and preference, from square dancing to golf. Finding a companion to share your interests might present something more of a challenge – almost as much of a challenge as fighting to stay single!

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Sex with Younger People: Boomers Bridging the Gap

Karen Turner — Fri, 01 Sep 2023 19:53:13 +0000

As middle and older age creep up on us, the sexual habits that formed a good part of our early life suddenly present a problem, especially for people who have been bereaved and lost a partner who shared a sexual routine over many years. The sexual preferences that pleased a long term marriage partner might not necessarily satisfy a new sexual partner; they might even be distasteful.

The shock of discovering a younger partner without inhibitions, with a desire to be ravaged doggy style in the back yard dressed in fishnets, can be an education for a man now in the late stages of middle age, accustomed to sexual enjoyment with a wife now gone who habitually enjoyed the missionary position, with the lights strictly off and Mantovani gently serenading on the bedside locker.

Stepping through the time barrier can be scary for baby boomers. Being responsible for sexual liberation in the sixties does not necessarily mean all baby boomers are studs with a sexual repertoire to rival the Kama Sutra. Elderly bones and joints are sometimes a little less capable of dealing with sexual athletics and often gentle sex is preferred twice weekly rather than twice nightly.

Women who seek the company of younger men are often looking for a handsome escort, an active sexual partner and someone to dance with. Now and then women tire of being constantly in the company of men who are also baby boomers and want someone who is fit and strong enough to perform a little DIY around the house and some TLC in the bedroom.

Younger women who display a preference for older men might do so because older men popularly have more self control in bed than a younger partner. Young women who are particularly self motivated sexually will certainly appreciate an older man’s ability to wait for an orgasm until his partner has achieved satisfaction. Baby boomers were in fact more active sexually in their youth than any other generation and in the days before the HIV virus and AIDS awareness, multiple sexual partners were accepted as the norm.

Men who are baby boomers, now in middle age, might have more sexual experience to offer than a man now in his twenties could expect to gain over his lifetime. Some younger women find this sexual know-how intensely attractive.

The sexual habits of teenagers and people in their early twenties are now far more reserved than teenagers in the sixties; the risk of sexually transmitted diseases rules out the kind of experimental and unprotected sex enjoyed by many of the baby boomer generation. Perhaps this is the reason why so many younger women are happy with older men; the older man brings the slow hand of experience to the bedroom, while younger men are too excited to provide satisfaction to their partners and fare better with older women.

For people who are considering having a relationship with a younger partner but worry about the consequences, reservations are usually overcome by lust!

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The Psychological Article on Loss of Libido and How to Get it Back

Karen Turner — Fri, 01 Sep 2023 15:49:50 +0000

Loss of libido can be distressing, especially in later life when there is some prospect of being able to have some leisure time to pursue a more active sex life. To find a solution to a lack of libido, it is vital to find the cause of losing it in the first place and this will either be psychological or physical. Elderly problems will sometimes account for a loss of libido as a person might be experiencing physical disabilities such as aching joints or arthritis.

A physical problem might sometimes be easier to solve than a psychological disorder. For women who are suffering from a lack of sexual interest there might be an emotional cause such as increased stress resulting from losing the family home and having to down-size, or alcohol abuse will sometimes affect the libido. Prescription drugs such as tranquilizers taken to combat other elderly problems might also have an adverse effect on the patient’s libido, to the extent that someone might stop taking their medicine in an attempt to cure their loss of sexual appetite.

For some, losing their libido presents no hardship and they are happy to cruise along without having sex and not particularly missing it. Women are more likely to accept a loss of libido than men and tend to find other interests to replace their sexual appetite. Men tend to seek a solution more often and are more likely to be candid about the elderly problems or cause of losing their libido in the first place. For men, the solution might require professional psychological therapy combined with a prescription for Viagra to help with physical inhibition.

Women with elderly problems who wish to recover their libido might try using a sex toy such as a vibrator or cream stimulant to produce tingling and moistness before attempting sex with their partner. Sometimes this works but if the problem is psychological, professional help is nearly always the only solution.

A woman’s aversion to sex might be an adverse reaction to their partner’s increased desires and the ‘turn off’ simply a subconscious effort to limit sexual activity. It might be a more serious psychological barrier caused by traumatic events such as bereavement or divorce or the loss of a lifelong friend. The causes of loss of libido are numbered and varied and it is imperative to pinpoint the problem before a successful solution might be sought.

Occasionally, a person will sail through life without a problem but suddenly experience a drop in libido and consistently experience difficulty thereafter. The reason could be psychosexual and be dealt with by consulting a professional counselor but some patients endure months or years of misery before getting help.

When seeking professional psychological help for dealing with a loss of libido, always check the professional credentials of your chosen analyst. People with sexual difficulties are often a target for untrained opportunists to exploit indiscriminately for personal gain: the therapy they provide is unproductive and could even cause psychological harm.

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