Elderly Problems and How to Address Them in a Parent

An unfortunate drawback of entering late middle age is that one’s parents may be entering advanced old age, possibly experiencing elderly problems and generally being higher maintenance than one welcomes in later life.

There are elderly problems associated with physical limitations, mental impairment and social behaviour that we will all have to deal with at some time. Nobody is spared the ageing process, no matter how wealthy, how intelligent or how determined they are to stem the onset of the golden years.

When you reach your fifties and sixties, the antics of an elderly parent can turn your world completely topsy-turvy and transform daily routine or family outings into a battleground. Elderly problems in those of advanced years differ radically from the mild, ‘senior’ annoyances associated with approaching old age. Eighty and ninety year olds can be more exhausting than children but need not necessarily affect the family unit as deeply as you think.

Elderly problems may often take the form of rebellious behaviour. In that case, the very best way to tackle difficulties is with an air of pervading calm to dispel hysteria and tantrums. Confrontational statements should be avoided when dealing with extreme elderly problems, as any authoritative behaviour may be translated as ‘disrespectful’. At all cost it is important to retain an air of respect and affection, especially when dealing with parents displaying the symptoms of elderly problems. There is nothing more demeaning than being bossed around by Junior; even if Junior is nearly seventy!

While many elderly problems require younger carers to ‘take over’, some lend themselves to ‘self fixing’ procedures. Elderly hands may sometimes move slowly but they do, nonetheless still move. It is far better to allow your elderly parent to change a light bulb if he or she is still able to do so, rather than rush to take the initiative before you have ascertained a need for help. Try to think whether you would welcome such help in their shoes and whether that help is more likely to be seen as ‘interference’.

Allowing an elderly parent some level of independence, wherever possible, is important. As the brain enters extreme old age, the more stimulation it receives the better. Taking control of small day to day tasks as a matter of routine will help your elderly parent maintain dignity and a sense of worth which might otherwise become impaired by relying on others completely.

Elderly problems need not intrude on your elderly parent’s ability to interact with the rest of the family and enjoy life.

This Psychological Article on Elderly Problems and How to Address Them in a Parent is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of suggestions on coaching to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

Boomer Yearbook is Psychological Articles for Baby Boomers. Connect with old and new friends, or expand your mind and ward off senior moments and elderly problems with dream analysis and online optical illusions and brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join other Baby Boomers to stay informed, receive weekly Newsfeeds, and let your opinions be heard. Baby boomers changed the world. We’re not done yet!